I thought I would put down some ideas from the male spanker’s perspective on what it is that drives men so wild with desire when spanking a lovely lady. The more you know, the more you can enhance the experience for both you and your partner. So, ladies, I will give you my side.
First understand, that I spank to excite, to arouse, to entice, and to substantially magnify my lady’s sexual pleasure.
I’ve found that erotic spanking is the most incredible form of foreplay, and the fact that it also gets me totally hot makes it totally complete.
I use the safewords “mercy” and “scared.” If my lady uses the word “Mercy” at any time, it ends everything and immediately stops the spanking. Things have gone too far. This gives my lady the opportunity to trust me in not exceeding her limits. “Scared” is used to tell me that things are beginning to get out of hand if I keep going at the tempo or intensity I am using. Having safewords gives her the confidence to submit to me without any real fear or reservations. Trust is essential and is always there. However, I frequently push the limits. I will spank her with more intensity than she expects, but less than she can handle.
Every male spanker obviously has an intense fondness for the female posterior. That goes without saying. It is visually stimulating, a beautiful target, located so close to a lady’s womanhood, and smack in the middle of several erogenous zones, all of which are extremely sensitive to the touch. I use this to full advantage. Understanding how the body reacts to various stimulation and mental input is key. The female bottom loves to be touched, fondled, caressed, and even spanked. I read body English very well and know when and how to apply my touch. Ladies, you can help your lover in understanding what you like, what you love, and how it excites you by discussing this openly. I vary my techniques on my lady’s desires. I ask her what she likes. I experiment some. I read her reactions. Most men will not do this openly and will go simply by trial and error.
A lady’s thighs are ever so sensitive to the touch.
I love to run my hands and fingers up and down her thighs, inside and out, from her knees to her wet and waiting lips. A woman’s thighs are highly underrated and should be given plenty of attention during a spanking session. If her panties are still up, I run my fingers up and down her thighs, stopping at her panties, running my fingers between her legs. I use my fingertips on her thighs, the soft skin lightly rubbing against her, then I turn my fingers over and allow my fingernails to lightly run along her silky skin. I then stop at her panties. I love to feel her wetness through them, be they silk or cotton. I further tease and play with her, rubbing her cheeks and then caressing more between her legs.
There are many things that excite a lady. The physical aspects of erotic spanking go far beyond the smacking on the bottom. When I tell a lady she is going to get a bare bottom spanking, she immediately gets a full rush, butterflies if you will, from the adrenaline coursing through her body. The mental picture I paint for her as I describe what will happen magnifies this. I use exaggerations of the intensity of the upcoming spanking with phrases like “I am going to spank your bare bottom until it is purple, or paddle you until you’re blistered.” That is an overstatement and used just to increase the adrenaline flow. It works! Adrenaline quickens the pulse, increases alertness, heightens the body’s awareness fully. It has the added affect of helping a lady get good and moist, as she becomes sexually aroused.
There are the psychological factors of power exchange, role play, and fantasy that add further to the excitement.
Having a man take charge in itself is electrifying to most ladies, but it gives a charge to the man as well. I am not into the BDSM lifestyle at all, but I do like to command the situation, especially when I know exactly what I am doing. Holding a lady when I spank her, when she squirms and writhes about, is so enticing, especially when I know it equally excites her. Even being ordered across a man’s lap for a spanking is a rush for most ladies.
Now, the spanking itself, begins slowly, almost gently.
Light swats, are paced evenly, with pauses for massaging, touching, lecturing, and teasing. This is the warm up and it does several things. The swats are sharp enough to get a reaction, increase blood flow in the cheeks, and produce that delightful tingling sensation that sets everything on fire down there. This excites, but it also begins the release of endorphins. Endorphins are the body’s natural reaction to stimulation, especially mild pain. They give the body increased blood flow, increased alertness, and a keen awareness of what’s happening, with an almost euphoric mental affect. I use this to magnify the wonderful sexual sensations ongoing.
Endorphins usually require a few minutes to takes affect. They are also short-lived as the body adjusts. To capitalize on this, I start out spanking slowly and fairly lightly, giving time for the reaction by massaging and fondling, then spanking some more, harder, then pausing and massaging and playing some more. These cycles of spanking and massaging increase in tempo and intensity each time to build on the previous state of arousal. I usually apply around 20 good swats then pause for a few minutes of massage. When the time is right, I slip my fingers inside her wet and waiting womanhood to masturbate her ever closer to orgasm. Then more, sharper spanking to increase endorphin release and pull her back a little from the edge of orgasm.
Orgasm control is a wonderful technique to ultimately magnify an orgasm’s intensity. I never let my lady cum without permission. She must hold back, allowing it to build up. Like riding a wave, I get her right on the edge, then keep her there. I warn her that if she comes without permission, I will know by the telltale signs, her writhing and the goose bumps on her hot red cheeks. I tell her that if she comes without permission, she will get an immediate hard and long flurry of swats. I frequently keep a paddle right there for this purpose, as a threat to make her hold back. I will likely give her a good swat or two with the paddle so she knows it is there. The incentive is to make her wait until just the right moment. Then, like releasing the floodgates, very powerful orgasms flow one after the other. I am the judge of when the time is right, based on her body language, her breathing, and her writhing.
I like to spank her over my bare thighs. I may spank her while wearing my shorts or while we are both nude. I find that she reacts much faster feeling my bare thighs under her. She also has the immediate feedback on my state of arousal. Without mistake, she knows when I am excited.
When the time is just right, I coax her through orgasm, usually multiple orgasms, as I vigorously masturbate her. The spanking may last from 20 minutes to as long as an hour or even more, carefully orchestrated to bring her to the right states of arousal. Like climbing stairs, she can be taken to one level to another, each a bit higher, more intense. The orgasms can truly be the most fantastic of a lady’s life. And that feeds my excitement in preparation for a long and serious lovemaking session.
For an added treat, I often go into a 69 position with her on top, so I can begin to enjoy physical pleasure while closely examining my handiwork. I can also spank lightly while bringing her to another orgasm or two, or three.
So, ladies, if this sounds exciting to you, I suggest you print this off and talk about it with your lover, husband, boyfriend, or significant other.
You can’t get exactly what you want until you ask. This may help him in visualizing what can work. I would also suggest that there are literally thousands of variations on spanking. Try out different things. Play is the spice of a love life. Go for it. You only live once.