Spanking For The First Time

There are six  TYPES OF ADULT SPANKINGS. This page deals with so called “play” spankings, although much of what is said here applies to other types, including punishment spankings.

The first spanking for an adult should be as pleasurable as possible. If the experience is positive, it is likely to be repeated. This page is a “101” or primer for those new to spanking.

The contents of the  FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS  Page should be read and understood in conjunction with this page. The  menu page lists the main practical advice pages on the site. Do not get too involved with detail at this stage.

We try to keep sex out of the spanking equation for various reasons ( see  FAQ  Page ). Likewise, the sex of the participants is not regarded as a major factor in our pages. Our visitors are interested in the following approximate ” mixes ” in spanking :

  • 55 %  Male / Female
  • 30 %  Female / Male
  • 10 %  Female / Female
  • 5 % Male / Male

This ratio is replicated in our pages, where possible. ( Some things are difficult to come by, for example, Female / Male cartoons from the 1950’s.)

Many visitors are interested in more than one ” mix “, e.g. ” switches ” who reverse roles.

Do you want to spank or be spanked ?

To start with, both participants should be happy to ” Give it a go “, with a light to medium spanking ( see  LEVELS  Page ). It is important not to be judgemental, just follow the suggestions on this page and take it from there. Consider personal  SAFETY  and the use of  SAFEWORDS. It is suggested that, in the beginning, only the hand is used together with the classic over the knee position, which is relatively comfortable, intimate and good for ” control “. A bare bottom is best both because of the better sense of touch and the ability to monitor the bottom’s state as the spanking progresses.


The recipient should be comfortable position ( it may be necessary to support the upper body ) before starting. The spanking should begin with a gentle warm up over the whole buttocks ( see M/F image above ) with rubbing and resting occasionally. Keep up a conversation using positive terms, this helps to gauge how the recipient is taking the spanking and builds a positive attitude. This preliminary process should take about 5 minutes. The spanking proper may take another 5 to 10 minutes, after which the bottom should look like this ( not redder! ) :

The spankee may or, most probably, may not  CRY  as a result of the spanking. Take crying as it comes, it should occur towards the end, if the spanking level was correctly progressed.

On the other hand, laughing would suggest increasing the level!

The final stage is a gentle massage, perhaps with some  HONEYBUN CREAM.

Talking about the experience afterward is a very important part of the exercise, especially when a female is involved. Many males forget to do this!

After one has lost one’s spanking virginity, so to speak, the next step is to try out some  IMPLEMENTS  and other positions to find the type and method of spanking which suits you and your spanking partner.



A Question

Hi! I read what you have on your website about disciplinary spankings, but I have a question. There is someone I trust pretty well, who is willing to provide some disciplinary spankings for me ( for attitude and behavior modification ). Neither of us is interested in anything playful or erotic, in the least. My mentor doesn’t want to tell me how many spanks I’m going to receive, nor how long a disciplinary spanking lasts. He did say he will probably take me over his lap for my first spanking, do it bare-butt ( with thong panties on me, though ), and he will most likely use a wooden hairbrush. He promises it will not be abusive or brutal, but he did say it will probably leave some marks. I am really wanting to know what you think, as far as how long such a spanking might take ? How will my mentor know when I’ve had enough, but not too much ? He doesn’t want me to be overly focused on pending spankings, so he’s not telling me everything yet. I’m hoping you can shed some light, as I’m really curious about how many swats I may get, how long it should take, and how sore I will end up being, and for how long. Thanks for any help you can offer–the curiosity is killing me!

………. Anon

This is really along the lines of ” How long is a piece of string ? ” There are so many variables, for example, if he starts spanking hard with a hairbrush, you will be wanting up in seconds and probably in tears within a minute. If you completely trust him, and he knows what he is doing, we would advise leaving it up to him. If this is to be your first spanking, we would strongly suggest that you follow the procedure outlined on this page and make the next spanking a disciplinary one. That way he will know your tolerance level and you will know what you are in for.





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