Mutual erotic spanking

( From a readers E mail. )

HI, For a total newbie I think your site is great, very helpful info!! Have some suggestions for what I would like to see on your site.. what I was looking for: My boy friend and I both think we would like mutual erotic spanking but have no exposure and no experience.. spanking that doesn’t really involve doms and much into pain any suggestions?

The other thing we seem to be wondering about is that both of us want to be spanked, probably both subs I guess..I read the part about switching but because we have no experience we don’t know the interesting phrases or words that might increase the setting/scene etc If we wanted to take the dom role, **We don’t know the words a dom would use** so cant take the part if you know what I mean.

Wish you had some help with how to set the scene as a dom for a newbie. Are there any guides/info etc or stories or scenarios where the spanker isn’t a dom but just wanting to please… what kind of verbiage or scene setting would be good for that? Any suggestions would be most appreciated.


This is my answer:

It was just as easy to answer you with this page. We like to use spanker / spankee or giver / receiver to avoid BDSM terminology and the POWER EXCHANGE involved in adult spanking. Needless to say, there is some pain involved in spanking, but it does lead to a pleasurable feeling afterwards, as you should find out.Erotic spankings can be the best of all, because of the way in which pleasure and pain is mixed with a degree of erotic stimulation. Do not become too ” Erotic “  as you may become distracted from learning about spanking !

A suggestion is not to worry too much at first about role playing, concentrate on finding which positions, implements, levels etc. you prefer. Look at the  AMBIANCE  Page for some more information.  Remember to communicate as you experiment with spanking.The following links should put you into information overload : Female to Male Spanking


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